Like a week that's only mondays, only ice cream never sundaes.

A remarkably peculiar epiphany dawned upon me just a few moments ago. I am, under some circumstances, an emo.

It's funny to admit, really. But what difference does it make? The word itself is derived from the word emotional. And if you look it up in the dictionary, being emotional is not that bad. If we don't interpret our emotions, we'll be like zombies ordered to function on a certain daily basis.

The truth is, our culture has overstated that term and has associated many things with it. Over time it has been equivalent to side-swept bangs, slashed wrists, eyeliners, noisy guitar riffs, and melodramatic vocals. That's why it's shameful to entertain the fact that you're one of them.

It's closely similar to liking the whole Twilight franchise. I don't like Twilight, just to clear things out. But there are some people out there who actually do, but are ashamed to say so. Because if you say you're a Twilight fan, you're also saying Bella and Edward is the best fictional couple there is, you're secretly praying Edward Cullen is real (but there's no chance he'll ever be, so stop dreaming), and you're a member of every possible Twilight forum. But you're not. Maybe like me, you just find some parts of the plot quite interesting and Jacob Black as one hot werewolf.

It's really peculiar a thought like this ever came to my mind. Especially in a time of giving and merrymaking. And so, I leave you with this video. All of the top 25 tunes of 2009 played together. It's brilliant.



I'm off, I still have some hearts to break. Haha. Enjoy the rest of the week! :)
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Without Love - Hairspray Soundtrack

Wish upon a silver cloud.

The holidays will give you boredom synonymous to a Saturday that runs for seventy-two hours-- I can attest to that. So with plentyyy of time to kill, I had my first try of putting the macro feature in the camera into use. And alas! Those are the results. The lighting could have been better, but well, who cares.


PS. The idea was originally from Krizzia, so many thanks :)
PPS. They're the presents I got for this year, by the way.

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241 - Rivermaya

You make it easier when life gets hard.

I've been trying with my utmost efforts not to feel lonely today. Yet like a missed exam in MAPEH or like an increasing debt in your class fund, it's something you can't avoid. I hate this. I partly hate vacations because you have nothing to do but rot and smell in your own friggin' room. It's horrible and it's disgusting. I miss school. I miss tapping Leide's shoulder every chance I get to. I miss Dory's bitter but entertaining passages written on the board. I miss my classmates who call my attention for my mirror/powder/tablet paper. I miss secretly munching at Ma'am Chavez's class. I miss the escape, the bliss SkyFlakes gives every time I hunger. I even miss Sir Jonatz who always tries best to look sharp in his low-waist jeans, visible undies, and Penshoppe shirts. And this is just the Christmas vacation, how much more after graduation(AAH, the g-word)?

______________________________
Lucky - Jason Mraz and Colbie Cailat

Love isn't love till you give it away.

Before my brain heads for another somersault, and while the remnants of last night's party still sting clearly, I will be publishing the customary post-party entry. I won't be narrating you the tales of yesterday anymore. I'm aware that you've had your own parties and principally, ours was boring. Instead, I think I'll just be posting some photos from last night. I do have a lot of those.

I hope you don't get misdirected by the photos. I was there but I don't have, and will never have that courage to take a sip. I still have plenty of years left to enjoy. Well, chow!

**Photos compiled on Paint. Oh yes. Seriously.

______________________________
Send It On - Disney Stars

It feels like fourteen carats but no clarity.

" You may not be her first, her last, or her only. She loved before she may love again. But if she loves you now, what else matters? She’s not perfect - you aren’t either, and the two of you may never be perfect together but if she can make you laugh, cause you to think twice, and admit to being human and making mistakes, hold onto her and give her the most you can. She may not be thinking about you every second of the day, but she will give you a part of her that she knows you can break - her heart. So don’t hurt her, don’t change her, don’t analyze and don’t expect more than she can give. Smile when she makes you happy, let her know when she makes you mad, and miss her when she’s not there. "

— Bob Marley

Again, nothing substantial.

I can't believe my colds are back again.
My immunity is getting weaker by the minute.
It's the first day of my last Intrams in high school today. How ironic.
If you're not going to count Micah's extra sweet gesture, nothing good happened today.
I want to/shall sleep after this.
But then, I can't.
Stupid.
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20 Dollar Nose Bleed - Fall Out Boy

I'm not the kind of girl to complicate the past.

In a pathetic attempt to give my readers (or imaginary friends) their daily fill of my rubbish blabbering, I will be publishing an entry from my Values Ed. journal. This was written on October 14 this year. If you can't read it well (of course you can't), you can click the picture for better resolution. That's 1600 x 1094 pixels of unconcealed thoughts. No erasures. No scratch papers. Just real rants and raves.

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A Love That Will Last - Renee Olstead

And you asked me what I want this year.

I don't need boxes wrapped in strings
and designer love and empty things--
just a chance that maybe we'll find better days.
Two words: World peace.
Nothing more.


(I feel a need to post a photo here relating to world peace but I can't think of one. So, yeah.)

______________________________
Better Days - Goo Goo Dolls

Pools of sorrow, waves of joy.

My favorite photo from that night. Maybe some things really are built to last. (:

______________________________
Across The Universe - The Beatles

Before the icing hits the cake.

Today marks the first day of December, and as the Slytherin blackboard reminds everyone, it's Christmas in twenty-four days. Well, as far as my calendar is concerned, there are only 5 days that I would gladly be looking forward to this month. And here they are:

1. December 12 - The Mutya at Lakan Pageant Morning. I know it sucks like a leech (boring) but you, in case are rooting for a specific candidate, must accept that fact and arrive early to reserve yourself a seat. Haha. I'm part of the production staff so that's not a problem for me. Gahh. I'm so excited for this.
   
2. December 14 - 17 - The Intramurals. We're seniors now so things are wayy more different. We're no longer the underdogs that three batches spite on. But if they want history to repeat itself, I don't mind. We don't need an ally. We can do bad by ourselves, thank you very much.
   
3. December 18 - Christmas Party. Nothing special. I don't actually know why I look forward to this.
   
4. December 21 - Chocoholics' 3rd Anniversary. We'll make this one real special since it's the *sniff* last one we'll get in high school.
   
5. DECEMBER 25 - It's the most wonderful time of the year. With kids jingle belling and everyone telling... okay, you know the song so I'm going to stop now.
   

Well, have a happy December everyone! Cheers! :)
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Procastinator - Sandwich

The best thing is that it's happening to you and me.

I'm happy.

For the first time in a long time, that's a statement affixed with a tone a certainty.
I am happy.
This time I know I'm sure.

:)

And the reason is you.

So this is what it's like.

You disregard the mathematical equations in front of you on purpose so you can draw a girl. A sad girl holding a cheerless, fixed stare, clasping a closed umbrella, and enduring the heavy downpour. Even before you finish, you realize that the illustration somehow depicts reality, and that it is pure emo-ness. You decide to discontinue but after a minute, decided against it. Your seatmate sees what you are doing and then sneers at your sketch. So you finally stop, tuck the drawing away, and arch your head towards the armrest until your blood gushes to your brain causing you an immediate headache.

You excuse yourself out of the class to consult the canteen because teeming acid channels through your digestive system again. You reach the place of solace but see no delightful Sky Flakes. Crushed, you make your way to your classroom and let a tiny sigh escape from your lips. You convince yourself that you deserve this misery so you sulk in your seat for the rest of the period as a loud protest start in your belly.

You persuade a good friend to buy your favorite Hot Fudge Sundae after class, thinking that it will condensate your depression. Once there, you see the droplets of water from the inside and stare as it plunges to the crowded road. You have always loved the rain but today it seems to be indifferent to you.

The same good friend tries to cheer you up by doing some tricks on your white balloon. You try to fake a laugh but good friend notices that you're faking it anyway. Good friend tells you that you cannot appreciate the effort and walks away from you. Good friend returns to your side and laughs again. You laugh out of modesty and you wonder how good friend manages to be happy despite the many adversaries in life.

You play your music player on shuffle but you skip every upbeat song and instead opt for slow tunes that you hate listening to on ordinary days. But then you realize that 97% of the songs in your play list are happy tunes so you turn the speaker off, and bask in the silence resonating through out your whole household.

So this is what it's like.


______________________________
Reason - Hoobastank

Video Phone.

Lady Gaga looks so weird when she's normal. I'm just saying.

I never lived the dreams of the prom kings and the drama queens.

Unlike my more fairly talented batchmates, I've been cemented in this piegonhole for the last 24 hours. I have lazed around our house and have manifested the symptoms of Saturday Syndrome: eating excessively, sleeping excessively, channel surfing excessively, and Text Twist-ing excessively.

To make your time worthwhile, I present to you a bland biography of yours truly. I have no idea where this idea came from. Possibly because I'm the ugliest narcissist in the face of the Earth.

Full Name: Veronica Page del Castillo Chavez
Nickname: Nica/Beno/Page/Niks
Birthday: February 24, 1994
Favorite Music: As of the moment: Beyonce, Colbie Caillat, Fall Out Boy, Goo Goo Dolls, Jack Johnson, James Morrison, Jason Mraz, John Legend, John Mayer, Justin Timberlake, Lady Gaga, Lifehouse, Maroon 5, Oasis, Paolo Santos, Paramore, Panic At The Disco, Pussycat Dolls, Relient K, Sandwich, Sara Bareilles, Smashing Pumpkins, Snow Patrol, Sugarfree, The Academy Is, The Beatles, The Cure, The Script, The Veronicas, Urbandub
Favorite numbers: 7, 11, 16, 23, 24
Favorite colors: blue, yellow, black, white
Favorite days: Wednesday, Friday, Saturday
Favorite months: February, April, December
Favorite food: Pasta, Pizza, Cheeseburgers, Anything that my dad cooks :)
Favorite fruits: Apple, Banana, Green Mango, Strawberry
Favorite vegetables: The green and leafy ones
Favorite sweets: Practically everything. From crinkles to Sansrival to sundaes to frozen yogurts and ice creams to cakes to merchandised chocolate bars-- I love them all.
Favorite shows: Chowder, Phineas and Ferb, Wizards of Waverly Place, TMZ (HAHAHA:D) Frankly, I don't watch the TV that much.
Loves: Good books that doesn't require the dictionary, Good food that I can afford, Good company who knows my brand of humor, Good movies with original plots, Good music with brilliant lyrics, Good weather-- preferably cloudy, Good scents that agree with my sensitive nose, Good events that I can replay to a hundredfold
Hates: Waking up early, Philippine Politics, FROGS, Failing, Memorizing foreign names and languages, Asian teleseryes, Liars, Conformity, Getting sick, Decision-making
Only my closest friends know that: I am always late at meetings scheduled on weekends.
If I had superpowers, it would be: Apparition. No more latecomings!
I admire girls who: can get ready in less than three minutes.
I respect guys who: know how to take rejection like a mature gentleman.
I cannot fall for someone who: loves me more than hisself.
Words I live by: Live for the moment and the moment will live forever :)

40 days 'till the ha-happiest days of all!

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No Such Thing - John Mayer

Lock and load. Baby, let's go!

"The reason Edward can’t read Bella’s mind is because she doesn’t have one."

-Reason #65 of Why I Hate Twilight

Yes, I am aware that my hatred for Twilight is slightly becoming overrated. But that statement is too good to be just kept to myself. I can't help it. It's one of the few things that has given me great amusement last week.


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Diamond Shotgun - Chicosci

Eyes are stickin' like honey on bees.

My heart almost literally skipped a beat when I saw this. I've never been a fan of movie adaptations because it discard the essential bits, but I'm surely gonna watch out for this one.

This book is a favorite because:

1. It accurately encapsulates the pure definition of love.
2. It also has none of those fabricated scenes that are so impossible to happen.
3. I love how Savannah and John associate the full moon with their togetherness.
4. It doesn't have the stereotypical happy ending. SPOILER.
5. With Channing Tatum, it's a definite win.
   

Watch the theatrical trailer here.


______________________________
Chillin' - Wale ft. Lady Gaga

You say you want a revolution, well you know, we all want to change the world.

So, it took me a week and a day to refuel my battered nerve cells. And yet I'm here again with another non-committal post saying that I will be avoiding you and yet I can't. Sighh.

Today is probably going to be the most eventful day of the week. Trust me, it wasn't pretty. Especially if you have seen and heard everything firsthand. We're all under the same dilemma and I think the best action is to do the RIGHT thing.

Well, I'll be off. I still have some duty I need to fulfill.

**You give me something that makes me scared, alright.This could be nothing, but I'm willing to give it a try. Please give me something 'cause someday I might know my heart. <33

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Revolution - The Beatles

It's so cliché to tell you that everyday I spend with you is the new best day of my life.

The 5 Relient K songs I adoooorrre:

1. Must Have Done Something Right: If anyone can make me a better person you could/ All I got to say is I must have done something good /I came along one day and you rearranged my life / All I got to say is I must have done something right
2. The Best Thing: I always knew I'd find someone/ I never dreamt it'd be like this/ Cause you've surpassed/ All that I'd hoped for and ever wished/ And I'm trying so hard/ With all my heart and mind/ To make your life as good as you've made mine
3. Be My Escape: And I’ve been housing all this doubt and insecurity/ And I’ve been locked inside that house/ All the while you hold the key/ And I’ve been dying to get out/ And that might be the death of me/ And even though there’s no way of knowing where to go/ I promise I’m going
4. Who I Am Hates Who I Have Been: I heard the reverberating footsteps/ Synching up to the beating of my heart/ And I was positive that unless I got myself together/ I would watch me fall apart

And my ultimate favorite:

5. Up and Up: I'm on the up and up/ Yeah there's nothing left to prove/ Cause I'm just trying to be/ A better version of me for you/ A better version of me/ For you

I will be limiting my Internet use this week. I've been enslaving myself to this radiated monitor 4 hours a day for 4 consecutive days. Well, that's just not me.

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Must Have Done Something Right - Relient K

Hey, you know this could be something.

If there is one thing I'd love to finish right now, it will be our Physics PowerPoint presentation. According to the properties of this .ppt file, it was created on Saturday, September 26, 2009, at 2:57:15 PM which means that I have been putting this off for more than a month now (36 days to be exact). The fact that we're the last group is slowly becoming a bad thing. If this was like any other PowerPoint presentation, I would have completed it in a jiffy. But nooo, it's not like any other PowerPoint presentations because it concerns combustion and nanoparticles and iron oxides and all those scientific terms that I can't force to permeate through my hard skull.

Physics is hard. Converting iron oxide back into usable fuel is harder. But making a substantial PowerPoint presentation about it has to be the hardest of all. X(

As promised, here's my list:

The 5 websites I constantly visit

1. To Do: The tagline speaks for itself: "Post-it notes left to their fate in public places"
2. Graphic Everywhere: This site holds anything from the odd to the awesome.
3. I heard it at the movies: Being an absolute movie junkie, this is where I get my dose of funny, cheesy and stirring and movie quotations.
4. Kiss the stars with me: Incredible, incredible photography
   
5. freckles in the sky: I really look up to her powerful nationalism. And she's a good writer.
   

Your vote, your ONE vote, won’t count. However, if you read up, engage in intelligent political conversations, blog, Tweet, use your Facebook status and convince other people to register and collectively support a candidate, then you can make a difference. If everyone gives importance to their vote, then you have 9 million informed decisions pushing for reform. The youth (defined in the Constutition as 15-30 years old, RA 8044) is 50-60% of the voting populace. Because we have the privilege of being literate and educated, our votes should trump the uninformed, those being blinded by all the uh, colors. Voting isn’t just a right, it’s a responsibility.

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Two Is Better Than One - Boys Like Girls feat. Taylor Swift

Leap and the net will appear .

I have recently finished clearing up the obsolete moss and cobwebs in my room. Various labors kept on coming endlessly that I hardly had time to pile my stuff neatly. Projects, tests, exams, extra-curriculars, comedy, drama, tragedy and romance-- name it, I've had it. The past weeks were a pure fusion of everything about high school and everything in-between. It was tough being stuck in that phase but now that it's partially over, I can't help but think that there's more to come.

On a totally unrelated note, I think my previous post's contents only ranges from movie one-liners to typographies to hello-goodbyes to relatively honest lyrics to random thoughts. And I'm thinking that it can already be bordering on boring. I know a blog is an online journal where you can freely post whatever you please but I think I may be missing something. And yeah, I may be losing my sense of wonder.

I hope you enjoy my new skin. As much as my abilities have let me, I've personalized it by making the photos of my cliques as navigators. That's 123Boom!, CA, and ChocoSugMel! respectively.

Also, from now on, I will be posting a random 5-item list. It can be a list of anything. Favorites, boos, songs--- it could be really anything. And to start off the list is:

The 5 Things I Did Today

1. Woke up because of Jenny's phone call. I got up but she already hung up.
2. Painted my toenails a pale plum color. It's really messy since its my first time.
3. Went downtown to have my school shoes fixed. But the shoe repair shop was closed so I ended up buying the November issue of Candy.
4. Watched 2 hours of The Grim Adventures of Billy & Mandy non-stop. It's my all-time favorite cartoon.
5. YouTube-ed the Halloween special of Wizards of Waverly Place. All of them are starting to look so grown-up. Max's voice is more manly. Alex cut and curled her hair and she's putting on make-up now. Justin's hair is not waxed into a shark style anymore, it's all shaggy now.

Okay, that was plain boring. Well, Happy Halloween everyone!
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Make It Mine - Jason Mraz

Your mind's in disturbia.

Put on your brake lights
You're in the city of wonder
Ain't gonna play nice
Watch out you might just go under
Better think twice
Your train of thought will be altered
So if you must falter be wise

I'll be back soon. I promise :)
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Disturbia - Rihanna

It's like the darkness is the light.

Despite my zero alcohol intake, I'm struggling in summoning the events of yesterday night.

Okay, as far as I can recall, I got there some minutes past six donning a gray shirt and a short approximately three inches above my knees. Yes, I did not stick to the strict dress code. Mocked and scorned at, I hurriedly started a pursuit for a black shirt. I wasn't bothered by my short shorts even if most of my batch mates commented on it. Not a minute later than the start of my pursuit, I managed to borrow a spare black shirt from Brene. Problem solved.

After that, I resumed my post at the entrance. While the whole student body was applauding Superman and Supergirl's performance, we were still at the gate welcoming outsiders and alumnus who, like me, are not wearing a black shirt. We (the officers) were all stunned when the emcee suddenly announced that it was time for the oath taking. So we dashed to the lobby and I carelessly tossed my bag in the flagpole. Haha.

We rushed to the entrance again and did the routine: pay, rip and proceed. But upon hearing that they were gonna present the Mutya and Lakan candidates, we dashed to the lobby and sneaked to the front row of the audience. Go Precious from Hufflepuff! Go Miriam! Double-up much? Hahaha.

By the end of the programme, my stomach was rumbling with pain and acid again. Ma'am Chica invited us for free food but I had to resist because of my hyper acidity. So did Cathleen. Since we were both having an overflow of acid in our stomachs, we routed for a bread instead. It was awkward having to stand opposite a person crying in ache and having no power to alleviate that ache. Trust me, it was. So I politely excused myself, and headed to the lobby again, only to find myself being questioned about the inexistence of extension wires.

The minutes of last night advanced on pretty quickly. Although, there were times when things made a sudden shift of pace. One was when I cried. Another was when we were making these silly moves with Sir Jonatz. Third was when Detsub was hamming it up. And lastly, was when Whine Up played through the speakers while I was with my junior classmates. That moment was priceless.

I'm sure it has nothing to do with the number 24, but yesterday was a very very awesome night. It was nothing like how I pictured it. Why? It was much more. Much, much more. ♥

So, how's that for struggling?

"And, in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make..."

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Distubria - Rihanna

Whatever It Takes

"Any man has a chance to sweep any woman off her feet; he just needs the right broom."

- Hitch

This is something that I must to do 'cause I realized that it's about time.

I've convinced myself that I'll verbalize all these sentiments and all these apprehensions on the 21st of this month. It appears rather acerbic since it is after all, a special date to all of us. But I thought, I'd risk it anyway. If they are true friends, they'll understand. But today, I can't hold in or neglect issues that are as real as these anymore.

I type this with a heavy heart and a nagging voice in my head saying that I should not do this. But I want to. I have to.

What happened to us? In the beginning, I thought it was just me and my pretentious little brain who sensed that we are growing distant from each other. But the evidences are there.

I was suppose to post that last Friday but I never got the chance to finish it. Actually, I did have the chance, but I can't muster the right words or the right confidence. Maybe I'm scared or maybe I can't simply accept the fact that we've been in that phase of friendship.

Today, for the first time after a really long time, we had our traditional eat-and-chat. The food was fine with its generous serving of buttered chicken. The chat, however, was one big jolt of information. Maybe for them it's not, but for me, a resident of IV - C, it was all a shock. I still can't move on about some facts.

Even with reference to today's date, I did not greet any of them a happy blahh. I don't know. Earlier this day, I didn't see the sense of it but now, maybe. Just maybe.


A shameless plug:

Sci-Yawan
October 24, 2009, Saturday, 7-12 pm
P 20.00 admission ticket
Dress code: anything black
Dance, Dance, Dance!
P.S. Altogether let's pray for a wonderful weather. Thanks :)

______________________________
True Friends - Airto

Now I’m just trying to be honest with myself, with you, with the world.

I see your face in my mind as I drive away, cause none of us thought it was gonna end that way. People are people, and sometimes, we change our minds. But it’s killing me to see you go after all this time. Music starts playin’ like the end of a sad movie. It’s the kinda ending you don’t really wanna see. Cause it’s tragedy and it’ll only bring you down. Now I don’t know what to be without you around. And we know it’s never simple, never easy. Never a clean break, no one here to save me. You’re the only thing I know like the back of my hand. And I can’t, breathe, without you. But I have to, breathe, without you. But I have to. Never wanted this, never wanna see you hurt. Every little bump in the road I tried to swerve. But people are people, and sometimes it doesn’t work out. Nothing we say is gonna save us from the fall out. It’s two a.m., feelin' like I just lost a friend. Hope you know it’s not easy, easy for me.

And we know it’s never simple, never easy. Never a clean break, no one here to save me. And I can’t, breathe, without you. But I have to, breathe, without you. But I have to.

Sorry. Sorry. Sorry.

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Give Love A Try - Nick Jonas

A sense I never knew I had.

Falling in love should be easy, right? I mean it should be just like. . . falling. Effortless yet amazing. But why am I having a hard time? -On falling in love

Nothing important. I just thought of that earlier. Hmm. Lemme know what you think, okay?


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My Heroine - Silverstein

Hold on to your words 'cause talk is cheap.

My day started with my almost-tardy attendance, Lala's shocking trouble, my relentless anxiety for the improvised backdrop, my incomplete Math homework, the ruined time-frame, the unrehearsed intermissions and my frequent trips to the canteen, faculty room and 1 - Hephaestus.

My day is almost ending with a sore arm, leg and shoulder, heavy loads of homework, a stomach that has released too much air because of laughing but is still empty, drowsy eyes, a cluttered desk, and a more cluttered head.

In between these two were: cramming, a Kim Bum hysteria, an unsought argument in front of the whole class, a one-in-the-afternoon lunch, hilarious jokes, a perfect test (Pampadagdag lang. Bleh.), tracks that are playing in repeat, the Cristine Reyes and Noah incidents, and more, more cramming.

Summing it up, this day was great-- and that doesn't come too often this year. I'm so tired yet so happy. Nothing else comes close to the oddness I'm feeling. I wish tomorrow's going to be as good as today. And the day after that. And the day after tomorrow's tomorrow. Hah!

I can't keep to myself all these things I would initially hide. I'm too frightened of regret. But what if I didn't try to let you know what's going on 'cause to let it go just can't be done?
-Give It, The Out of Body Special


P.S. I had my braces removed last Monday. But mother says I'm still bound to wear a retainer.
P.P.S. Herbert says he heard "choomboombleh" in You Make It Real (James Morrison).


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Fall For You - Secondhand Serenade

I’m finding that you and you alone can break my fall.

"Nostalgia - it's delicate, but potent. Teddy told me that in Greek, 'nostalgia' literally means 'the pain from an old wound.' It's a twinge in your heart far more powerful than memory alone. This device isn't a spaceship, it's a time machine. It goes backwards, and forwards... it takes us to a place where we ache to go again. It's not called the wheel, it's called the carousel. It let's us travel the way a child travels - around and around, and back home again, to a place where we know we are loved." ---Mad Men episode 113, "The Wheel"

I can't think of anything to write. Must be because of the whether. Gosh. It must be 20 degrees outside.

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Learning to Breathe - Switchfoot

Falling, yes I am falling.

Eh saan ka naman mahuhulog?
Hindi ko alam.

Eh bakit mo pa nilagay yan?
Sa malayo, ang iisipin na mga makakakita nito, nahuhulog ako para sa isang tao. Ang totoo, para akong nahuhulog mula sa isang milyong talampakang gusali. Tapos bubudburin ako sa isang milyong piraso para lang ipakain sa mga manok sa bukid.

Ang arte mo naman.
Hindi ako maarte 'no. Ganito talaga ako sa normal kong kondisyon. Hindi ko lang masyadong pinapakita.

Ows?
Oo. Kung ayaw mo maniwala eh di 'wag. Sino ka nga pala?

Isang maliit na boses sa utak mo na: ikaw ang gumawa, gustong lumabas kaso pilit mong hinaharangan at isang guni-guni na inimbento mo para libangin ang iyong sarili.
Bakit naman ako maniniwala sa'yo?

Kasi ako ay ikaw. Tayo ay iisa. Tayong dalawa. Hahaha. Ang baduy ko pala. Parang ikaw.
Ewan ko sa'yo. Matutulog na'ko. Bukas wala ka na.

Tingnan lang natin. Hindi mo ko kayang i-terminate. Hindi ako tulad ng isang palabas sa TV na kina-cancel kapag hindi nagcli-click sa masa.
*Signature taray look* Whatever.


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I've Just Seen A Face - The Beatles

Goodnight, goodnight.

"There are many types of ships. There are wooden ships, plastic ships
and metal ships. But the best and most important type of ships is friendship."
I'm not sure if that's a joke or what. I just miss them so much that it
made me blog about them for completely no reason at all. Dramaa.

By the way,
Who is the cutest?

______________________________
Goodnight, Goodnight - Maroon 5

Take a look at yourself and then make a change.

Michael Jackson remix @ Yahoo! Video

Watch it! Watch it!


______________________________
Man In The Mirror - Micheal Jackson

It may sound cliché but I'm here to stay.

One word, seven letters, cleared everything out.


______________________________
Two Things - Urbandub

Love burns brighter than sunshine.

I find it really hard to write again. Ever since that incident, I feel like my knack for writing is obstructed by some invisible hedge. I mean, come on. How can I put into words all these pent-up feelings and release it one forceful blow? Before, it appeared easy. I never had much to say and my decision was final. But after a couple of days, friends intervened and dilemmas surfaced. Now, I feel plagued by all the biotic and abiotic factors (Biology! :D). If I choose this, he may never speak (chat) to me ever again and I will lose the friendship that has been built for the past month. If I choose that, I will finally settle the issue that has been going on between us since our sophomore year. What the hell will I do? Anong gusto mong gawin 'ko?

Hindi mo lang alam,
Takot lang akong masaktan.
Iniingatan lang aking puso.
Kung maiibibigay ko lang ang sinasabi mo,
'di na sana tayo nagkakaganito.
Pasensya ka na kung hanggang dito muna tayo.
-Tulak ng Bibig, Julianne


______________________________
Brighter Than Sunshine - Aqualung

Well, my heart went "boom," when I crossed that room.

At the moment, I have three sorts of fluid within my reach: a bottle of orange juice, a liter of lukewarm water, and another bottle of harvested honey from Albay. I'm gradually taking each in turns in the hope of getting rid of my nauseating cough and colds.

If not for German's status message on YM the other day, the fact that we're on the breach of September wouldn't penetrate my solid skull that much. I know it has been said a million times before, but time flies really fast. But come to think of it, time doesn't fly. Time ticks. Time is gold. Time is wasted. Time is wasted by yours truly.

My brother's shoving me off the computer chair. Maybe that's an indication that I should really write that letter. Well, maybe I should.


Ba-ba-booom!


______________________________
I Saw Her Standing There - The Beatles

Maybe sometimes, we feel afraid, but it's alright .

The day has ended.
The sun has set.
The blinds have closed.
The last show has concluded.

It's still not working out.
It's still driving you(?) crazy.
The usuals are still being continued.
Nothing is still cleared out.

And you're still the friend na may yiih.

______________________________
Put Your Records On - Corinne Bailey Rae

When it rains on this side of town, it touches everything.

Don't get me wrong, I love the rain.

I love how the drips of rain produce an enchanting harmony as it fall on the roof. I love how beautiful it is looking at each tiny droplet, and watching it magically splatter into a thousand molecules. I love how a mass of people dash for cover against the gentle rain. I love how the temperature is perfectly fitting for a quick or a deep slumber. And of course, let's not forget the food. The cozy chows will not only warm your whole system but will also heighten your laziness(Haha [:).

But there is this one thing I hate about the rain. Getting my feet wet.

I know that rain equates to water, and that water is further linked to wetness; but I just hate it when my toes get soaked by who-knows-what. Just imagine the microbes, the cigarette butts, the scraps of plastic and the spit. The spit! That's the thing I hate the most.

I just hope it will not rain this hard or this often for the next days. Less than two weeks from now is our first parade. And we are so far from ready.

Anyway.

A silent combat has been going on. Of course, the backstabbing and the rumormill is inevitable. But no matter how serious it gets, I will suppress the urge to fight back. I'm not that stupid to stoop down to his very low level. I know better than that.

______________________________
When It Rains - Paramore

Sitting, Waiting, Wishing.

Searching all my days just to find you
I'm not sure who I'm looking for
I'll know it
When I see you
Until then, I'll hide in my bedroom
Staying up all night just to write
A love song for no one

-John Mayer, Love Song For No One

Try listening to this after listening to Sana (Up Dharma Down), Chasing Pavements (Adele) and Tumatakbo (Mojofly). Tingnan lang natin kung hindi ka maging jaded.

______________________________
Sitting, Waiting, Wishing - Jack Johnson

There's nothing you can do that can't be done.

It's just another normal Sunday afternoon.

Just like the past Sunday afternoons that have come and gone, I stretch the hours by either reading a new book, enslaving myself to the World Wide Web or dozing off like a fat lazy cat. But seeing that I have done all of the mentioned diversions, I'm going to do something else instead.

I'm going to tell you how I feel.

If you are one of those few persons who keep track of this blog, you're going to consider this as unusual, something that can happen only on an odd occasion. But I am presuming that you are not;so I'm going to carry on.

I feel beaten. The first quarterly exams have just ended but we, the seniors, are set to face another exam. The NCAE (National Career Aptitude Examination). Moreover, the administration modified our schedules to install an intense whole-week review which is composed of two hours each for Math, Science, English and Manipulative Reasoning. All of these equates to one word: stress.

I feel excited. Less than a month from now, all the sweat, the heat, the early morning jogs and the late walk in Park will be over. Last march, last parade. Simply writing it sends quiver down my spine. I really have to make this count.

I feel compelled. Lala and I are in-charge for the literary edition. The date of publication is roughly two weeks from this time; and we still haven't created a first draft. Boooo.

I feel dazed and confused. And I know you know why.

______________________________
All You Need Is Love - The Beatles

Ako, sila'y nandito na. Ikaw na lang ang kulang.

To understand a person's demeanor, we must take into consideration what was and what is. Just like how we study history. Just like how we evaluate a text (Pagsusuri ng Teksto ayon sa Teoryang Humanismo). We look into the past, and the present.

So we start from the end.

And by that, I mean I will refer to the first of my one hundred forty-three posts.

So here it goes.

After 1118 days, I still carry the same name, reside in the same zip code, and sleep in the same hour. I still loiter around the same corridors, publish paragraphs in the same blog, and interact with the same population. I still bore myself with boring things during boring Saturdays, still consider Jason Mraz as one of my favorite artists, still look forward for the annual Traslacion and still stir my mentality by looking at sunsets. I still consume a maximum of five hours in front of a radiated monitor, still don't accomplish homeworks at home, still repel any matter associated with Math, and still envision myself as a thriving astronaut after ten years or so.

But after 1118 days, I managed to renounce my patronage for Hale (It was just in my sophomore year when I realized that the lyrics of Hale are so cold), appreciate people not for their looks but for their values and relinquish the devil inside of me that got used to double-crossing.

I was able to do a production number and embarrass myself in front of a large mass of students, speak in a fake British accent and embarrass myself in front of a large mass of students, and sing “Brighter Than Sunshine” out of pitch––– and embarrass myself in front of a large mass of students.

I had three different hairstyles that were TORMENTED by people who may or may not care. I watched every multimillion-dollar fight of Manny Pacquiao and watched as Jinky get pregnant after every significant fight. I witnessed, for the very first time, a guy fell flat with his face to the floor. I protested against Apocalypse, our awful former batch name, and helped restore peace and order among classes. I was named as one of the members of the association that people feared and bowed down to upon hearing its name, The Chocoholics Association (Or Alpha Phi Tsokkolati) :D.

I received the first bouquet of flowers in my entire life(HAHAHA). I stumbled over the mini-fences in our school which caused a big lump of discoloration in my left leg. I used to get really doubtful because I never had a real crush. And then he came. I used to believe that I truly love him. But after a month, I realized that I still don't even understand what love is.

I was surrounded by people who always ate, rarely followed the rules, and never made a moment dull. I have cut class three times in the same subject, have dressed up like some eccentric, glorified superstar that was already verging on foolish, and have endured the relentless migraine and hyper acidity attacks that almost altered most of my moods.

I stepped once on our door at precisely 9 o'clock in the evening without my parents' consent. And that produced unkind words in my father's mouth and a week of suspicions and distrust. I stepped once into the door of a respected restaurant, sat for a while as the waiter handed the menu over, only to realize that I don't have enough money. So, WE hastily created a rational reason and excused ourselves out. Thus, we just ate at the restaurant beside it. The cheaper restaurant beside it.

I have swam twice in the same pool without my parents knowing. I did not sleep for a night for a group project that I completed all by myself . But I still got the highest score among our batch for an English exam that was scheduled the next day (HAHAHA, Arrogance much?) I have perfected two examinations so far, one of them being Trigonometry (I'm so proud!). I have turned down a suitor in one precise, calculated motion because I know I'm not ready yet. I belonged to two peer groups that immediately crumbled after a year. I played and won a volleyball game without using my hands (Hi Bea!). I forced myself into liking two freshman boys (not at the same time, of course) just so I can make use of my free time wisely.

And I am now cutting this autobiography short because I've been writing it for two days and I haven't had a decent sleep since the stressful exam week.

But you know, despite of every transient detail, one thing remained unchanged. Choomboombleh is still choomboombleh. It may have different versions but it will always be the word that means nothing but can still mean everything. It’s timeless.

______________________________
Sana - Up Dharma Down

Hope it gives you hell.

I am on a writer's block. Although I'm not officially known as a writer, I still want to use that 'cause it looks pretty cool. For unknown reasons, I just suddenly lost the ability and enthusiasm to produce new tangible posts. A lot has been going on, mind you. And it's not just the usual drama, this time, it's different. Might be because we're seniors now. Hmp. I really don't give a damn.

There were lessons learned.

FOR TLE IV

We've been tasked to reveal the things that we have acquired for the past weeks.

My first notion when I heard that we're going to study Computer Programming is that it's going to be more on the hardware. Like fixing computer circuits and cables and such. But when the subject came, my thought was wrong.

So far, we have discussed the matters regarding flowcharts and algorithms. It has been pretty good so far. I can easily relate it to life because we need to undergo failures and downfalls before we finally get it right. No pain, no gain - the old aphorism goes.

But it's not always pain. Learning computer programming in a fun way is beneficial to all of us because it teaches us how to learn one step at a time.

-Veronica Chavez

I'm your biggest fan. I'll follow you until you love me.

I haven't blog for awhile. Our computer is so rotten, it's better to push it to the drain. Hahaha. Nah. I'm just kidding. Actually, I'm using the computer access in our school right now. We told Ma'am Cathy we're going to use it for school paper purposes. That's partly true but apparently, not for me.

I don't know when I'm going to resume my writing. Hmm. I miss blogging, though. Everyone's into the blogging-thing again since our TLE teacher is requiring us. And the stupid Facebook. I don't think I'll join the Bandwagon. I'm better off without it.

I think this is goodbye. Our next class is Math. Yehey! - not. Pssh.

The right kind, the right line, or the right time to say almost anything that's right.

I lost my wallet today.

Well, more of a coin purse actually. A square, violet coin purse.

I'm not even regretful and sulky at all. Maybe because it contained only a small amount of money.

I don't mind if I don't retrieve it anymore. God has His own reasons.

As you can see, I'm renovating my blog-- both for personal and school purposes. It's not even done yet. No self-description, no mugshot, no links and no interesting extras. Like I said, I'm not done yet. The headers, by the way, are from the songs of Mr. A - Z, Jason Mraz.

And also, there's this new singer that I'm getting fond of. His name is Airto Moreira. Right now, he's only a YouTube singing sensation but I won't be surprised if he gets big in the music industry someday. He has a really amazing voice. And he knows how to play the piano. Tsk, tsk, tsk. Lucky guy. Here's his rendition of John Mayer's Dreaming With A Broken Heart.

This is the last time to get it right .

WE NOW HAVE READY INTERNET CONNECTION. WOOHOO! I CAN SING!

I've almost forgotten the swinging sensation that comes by whenever my fingertips interacts with our black keyboard. Yeah. I'm that dramatic. Now I can use and abuse our internet access whenever I wish to. Yahoo!

Moving on.

I have just officially gone through the first week of my last year. Does it really has to be that ironic? Pssh. I'm pretty sure this is going to be a tough year, though. And I hate it. I hate the fact that barely nine months from now, we'll be waving our bitter goodbyes and we will be attending who-knows-what universities. I hate the fact that we are the only senior section that is situated upstairs. I hate the fact that the classroom we happen to be occupying is the stupid and sultry computer lecture room. I hate the fact that by now, the only positive thing about our class is our convinient television (We can watch Wowowee and Kambal Sa Uma without difficulty. HAHA. Yeahright. Like that helps). I really, really hate the fact that our section name is IV - GRYFFINDOR (IV - C is a fat lot better and is easier to write). I hate the fact that people expect us to behave and act like role models for younger levels when I know all we want to do is get loud and noisy and enjoy the remaining time in NCSHS- fountain of truth, eternal source of strength :)

And I really, really, really hate the fact that Filipino is our last subject. Enough said. XD

I think I'll be blogging more than usual. Emphasis on the word think since sometimes my thoughts are wrong. But then again, I'll try.

Get ready, get set, Kim Bum Bum Pow, I'm back.


And let the good times roll in case God doesn't show.


P.S. There are still more "I hate the fact that" but some of it are mean enough for me to be sent to the guidance office.

Asta Lavista, Beybe. :)

If life won't wait, I guess it's up to me.

So many things to say, yet so little time.

There's actually a LOT of things roaming around my mind. From the imminent first day of my senior year to the submission of my application forms for college to the film adaptation of Paulo Coelho's Veronika Decides To Die and even up to the very publicized sex scandal of Katrina Halili (hindi ako magpapahuli!)

The return of our steady internet connection is still a far-fetched proposition.

I don't even know when my methodical life will come back.

All I know is that Kim Bum(?) of Boys Over Flowers looks a lot like Hayden Kho. HAHAHAHAHA:)


Hanggang kailan ka inosente? Katorseee.

It doesn't matter how I feel, my lips are sealed.

So. There I was. An unfulfilled incoming senior student walking the corridors of my beloved institution, somehow waiting for Unforgettable to knock into my doorstep.

I thought I was done waiting.

Until that uneventful day of April came.

I'd rather not talk. Wait, erase. I'd rather not talk yet.

*I hope you understand this post. I know it's lame. Waa. This long distance is killing me. HUHU:( I won't be updating for a while. There's no internet access in our humble home. You get the idea.


This is not goodbye. Never goodbye, just later. :)

One day you'll see her and you'll know what I mean. :)

Will you come home and stop this pain tonight ?

Now Playing: I'm Lost Without You by Blink 182

Edward: "OH MY GOD I LOVE YOU BELLA but I can't be with you because it's dangerous. YET I'M GOING TO STALK YOU ANYWAY and by the way, I'm a vampire and I love the smell of your blood. Then once I'm with you, I'm going to DISAPPEAR and destroy your life then come back and get all jealous over a werewolf who's YOUNGER than both of us and I'm not going to let you sleep with me until we're married - oh wait, I change my mind, just as you don't want too. By the way, I'll change you into a vampire once we're married and we can go out and suck blood together. Oh and I sniff sharpies and do heroine."

Bella: "OMG Edward I LOVE YOU AND I CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT YOU. I'm going to give up my LIFE for you and everything worthy about being human and destroy my parent's lives and hurt a million people just for you because I love you and I can't live without you even though you told me being a vampire totally SUCKS. I LOVE YOU SO MUCH EDWARD but I'm still going to go and KISS your arch enemy the WEREWOLF because I love him TOO, even though I'm engaged to you!! Oh, but wait I love you more. And no, I don't want to marry you right now, but yes, I want to be a vampire and be with you for the rest of my life. Yes, I want to sleep with you now, but wait - now that you want to I kinda want to do things right and wait."

Okay. I did not make that. I found that in the internet while I was purposely scanning for Anti-Twilight pictures while the Twilight hype was on a high. Good thing it has ceased already. It's really annoying. Everyone knew Twilight and they worshiped it like it was some divine creed or something. I can't even see why it was so. And they even dared to compare it to the Harry Potter series. Duh. Half of it won't even amount to J.K.'s mad writing skills. But there's no point in saying this. They're all in-love with the perfect Edward Cullen. Shameful psychos.

However, that does not lead me to the point of this entry. The truth is, I'm sick. And by sick , I mean being physically unwell and bedridden. This caught me off-guard since I have a strong resistance against illnesses and I normally get sick once every two years. I think this is what I get for those stupid wishes. Boohoo. I hope it doesn't last until Saturday. You know what I mean.

A sinking call, an out of sight hello.

Now Playing: December 2 Chapter VII by Taken by Cars

It's again that time of the year where roses are red, the music is set for the mood and the moon is like an egg yolk hanging on the vast dark sky. It's not Valentines Day, it's the penumbral lunar eclipse.

Of course, that was a joke.

The V-Day has gone and past my 14 (almost 15) years of existence, and leaving only chocolates that have been stored as fat, greetings and smiles from friends and that rose I got from my freshman year.

I'm not complaining. I'm young and I know that shouldn't get involve at a young age. But there is something that bugs me.

How come I never get lucky in love? My crush always end up with a girl (and they're just freshmen, mind you) and the unfortunate lads (yes, that's in plural form :D ) who had a liking for uhhm. . . me is not someone I want, or rather not someone I could want.

I'm so stupid for even opening this topic. I guess it's just that I don't give love much second thought and I'm afraid I'll end up like my sister. She's 20 years old but still cold this V-Day.

But for whatever it's worth, Cupid, point that arrow at me. :)

Oh shit.

Now Playing: Until the End of Time by Justin Timberlake

I try to vent my sentiments and anticipations through words. And profanity is not an exemption. Worry not, my dear friend, it's a free country.

WHAT'S ON VERONICA'S MIND

The debate. On which the topic will be whether the Philippines needs communism, yes or no. Our teacher will tell us which side we're going to defend on the day of the debate itself so that's going to be pretty hard. And of course, with the my predictable misfortune, I was chosen to be a speaker. A third speaker, to be more accurate. Which means I am one of those who will get caught with the war of words. The other one is Denise. I think that should help, since Denise is good with fights.

The presentation. Surprisingly I'm not that worried with the idea of dancing. Honestly, I don't care so much anymore. What I do worry though, is the group's performance as a whole. We didn't thoroughly practiced all of the steps today and most of us are not good dancers. Hay naku. Whatever.

The training. I think everybody sees me doing this every afternoon. It's not that bad as I thought it's going to be. That counts as a good thing, right?

The dance. Of course, the dance, the prom. No matter how I call it, it's still the same. As the event grows more imminent, the more the people are getting abuzz, which is a natural phenomenon, I understand. Good thing I've already found a beautiful gown. But I think could already be nominated as the next Disney princess because of its style. Nevertheless, its far better than the dress Bella wore at her prom. Hahaha. It's the leggings, you know.

The card. The 3rd Quarter distribution of cards is set on February 14. I think it's still far so I don't fret too much.

The test. We have a unit test on World War I and II on Monday. I'll add this so I won't forget.

The V-day. Speaking of February 14, how will I celebrate my February 14? I'm not looking for something you-know-what. All I really want is a box of crinkles. Or brownies.

The recipes. Deadline: Friday, February 6. We're asked to make a compilation of the recipes we've made the past three quarters, and I haven't even started yet.

The 15th birthday. Of course, my birthday should not be forgotten. Crap. I'm getting old.

The apple of my eye. Last, but definitely not the least. I'm not giving up and I don't mind, I don't care. I don't mind that he's still not over her and I don't care, that in his eyes, she's the prettiest. What I have is something not worth giving up.

It's kinda late but happy birthday.

Ma'am Elisa, it's your birthday.
God bless you this day.
You gave us the gift of a good adviser,
and I'll be good to you today.

Ma'am Elisa, it's your birthday.
Happy birthday, Ma'am Elisa.
I wish you love and goodwill.
I wish you peace and joy.
I wish you better than your heart desires.

Ma'am Elisa, it's your birthday.
Happy birthday, Ma'am Elisa.


YEAH!

P. S. Hindi ako sumisipsip. Ako'y sincere at natural na isang mabuting bata.

Supah Papalicious

Nakakalaglag ng panty. Pati na rin brief. :)

So what's the point in all of this when you will never change?

Now Playing: Between the Lines by Sara Bareilles

What is the point? Of course a point is a dot, a dot on the letter i or at the end of a statement. Crap. That's not what I mean and you're missing the point. But, what is the point?

Earlier this afternoon, with Lianne and Nat, I stormed the bridal stores downtown to look for a gown. Its for the prom, which is less than a month from now. Gowns, masks, flair, romance and all. Frankly, I'm just giddy and nervous about the whole picture. I'm sure it's a night that everyone's looking forward for.

I don't know what else to say. I think next time I'll open up about my imminent birthday, the not-so-recent oath taking of Obama or my haircut that as my classmates say, resembles the hair of our assistant librarian or my batch mate. What the hell. I don't give a damn.

I'm not dense. I just had a slight lack of common sense.

Now Playing: Geek In The Pink by Jason Mraz

I said I'll keep everything recent posted after the exam, but I didn't. I always do that. And I never understood why.

In fact, there are countless things that I never got to the point of figuring out.

Like how a supposedly stern subject, now verges on melodramatic. Yes, melodramatic. And I'm not overstating that.

Or how something so divine, something so true, is still stuck with her. And her is congruent to. . . I don't know, but definitely not him (and by him, I mean the something divine and true :) ).

Or how the heart presses to see something that the eyes cannot. Oh diba. Anlalim nun ah. You don't need eyes to see. Parang magic.

And for the last two things, and probably the most important: why the hell do my teeth hurt so much? And why do we need to learn the sine and cosine curves? Would it solve the LPG-crisis that is causing everyone to panic today? No, it won't. Of course it won't.

There's beauty in breakdown.

Now Playing: So Close by Jon Mclaughlin

So far, so good, I thought. It was quite simple, actually. They were once together but now it's over. There's no point in crying over spilled milk, right?

Or am I wrong? Oh well. It is not my business, anyway. Its theirs.

I hope tomorrow's gonna be a breeze, considering its the last day of the exams. And before I end this, I just want to announce that my literary skills (or whatever I thought I had) will make its reappearance soon after the quarterly examination, which is by Saturday, I think.

"A little nonsense now and then, is relished by the wisest men.
We have so much time and so little to do. Strike that, reverse it."

We're slow dancing in a burning room.

Now Playing: My Heroine by Silverstein

And so, as promised, I will now recount the incidents of last night's celebration.

Well, it must have been the Christmas breeze stroking our skins, or the chants and eagerness exuded by the witnesses, that made these two young souls sing their hearts out. It was a sweet and lovely sight, considering that he had croaky voice that night and she was afraid that she'd cry at the sound of his melodic voice.

That was last December. In fact, that was last year. Things are different now. Way more different.

Hello, beautiful people of Earth and beyond. Yes, I am still alive. :)